Book Review - Sex and the Believer
”Kosher” Marriage
The word “kosher” can be defined as, “fit and proper.” Bearing this in mind, one can’t help but wonder how Moshe K. can claim, “Torah is clear. Multiple marriages are kosher!” If it were kosher, then why would Adonai feel the need to regulate it? Deuteronomy 21:15-17 contains these regulations. He then stated, “A true Torah following husband will follow these regulations to make his wives feel significant, loved, guarded, nourished and protected, along with their children at all times.” Really? If you were to ask me, I would state that a Torah following husband would learn to control his desires and focus his attention on caring for the one wife that Adonai has given him.
Returning to the topic of polygyny, Moshe uses Joseph as an example of God’s prohibition against multiple husbands. He states, “Joseph was a future leader of Egypt; an Israelite leader living in Egypt. Yet he refused to have sex, or take Potiphar’s wife as his own. This was not because multiple marriage was forbidden; rather because Potiphar’s wife was already married and he refused to commit ADULTERY.” Remember this later when he again discusses the treatment of male slaves.The book of Job tells us that his wife told him to, “Curse God and die.” (Job 2:9) His wife is never mentioned again, yet at the end of the book we are told:
The LORD blessed the latter days of Job more than his beginning; and he had 14,000 sheep and 6,000 camels and 1,000 yoke of oxen and 1,000 female donkeys. He had seven sons and three daughters. He named the first Jemimah, and the second Keziah, and the third Keren-happuch. In all the land no women were found so fair as Job’s daughters; and their father gave them inheritance among their brothers. After this, Job lived 140 years, and saw his sons and his grandsons, four generations. And Job died, an old man and full of days. (Job 42:12-17)
Moshe Koniuchowsky assumes that Job’s first wife was sent away, without a bill of divorce, and that he then took a second wife who gave him the seven sons and three daughters mentioned above. His argument? First, Adonai told Job to pray for his two friends and to offer sacrifices on their behalf, but he is not told to do this for his wife, whose “curse God and die,” statement borders on blasphemy, according to the author.
He also states that because we are told, “The LORD restored the fortunes of Job when he prayed for his friends, and the LORD increased all that Job had twofold,” (Job 42:10) that we must now understand that Adonai has given Job two wives to replace the one he had previously. He actually states, “By implication, he had two new wives who were apparently bore the most beautiful women in the land…” As I stated earlier, he draws conclusions where there are none to draw.
Mr. Moshe K. also does the same with the story of Boaz found in the book of Ruth. He writes, “We see that righteous Boaz added Ruth to his wives/concubines as seen in Ruth 2:8 and 2:23. Obviously YHWH allowed him to add Ruth, who later would be in the matriarchal lineage of Messiah Himself.” So, let’s take a look at the Scriptures mentioned.
Then Boaz said to Ruth, “Listen carefully, my daughter. Do not go to glean in another field; furthermore, do not go on from this one, but stay here with my maids. (Ruth 2:8) So she stayed close by the maids of Boaz in order to glean until the end of the barley harvest and the wheat harvest. And she lived with her mother-in-law. (Ruth 2:23)
The word translated as “maids” in the verses above is numbered by Strong’s Concordance as 5291, pronounced as nah-ar-aw’ meaning: a girl (from infancy to adolescence): - damsel, maid (-en), young (woman). Nothing in this definition indicates that these girls are anything other than pre-pubescent, and certainly not married women or even concubines as Mr. Koniuchowsky plainly and clearly stated above.
Having done a study on the book of Ruth, I happen to know that the Jewish sages actually teach that Boaz’s wife died and was buried on the very day that Naomi and Ruth arrived. Although considered a very righteous man and even a judge in Israel by the sages, even they admit that the Bible does not directly state anything regarding Boaz’s marital status. So, not only is Mr. K. speculating regarding his wife, he is also changing the story to suit his needs (polygamy).
If polygamy is such a wonderful thing, then why does the author feel the need to stretch the truth to make it look like all of the best leaders were engaged in this activity? Moshe lists many of the judges as having had multiple wives, which is true, but we must remember that at the time of the judges each man did “what was right in his own eyes,” not necessarily the eyes of Adonai. Just because there were many men who were involved in this lifestyle, that does not mean that this is blessed and sanctioned by Adonai, nor does it mean that it is a part of His plan for our lives.